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Paying for Divorce

July 5th, 2015 at 09:07 pm

After the hell that was this past week, I've decided to go forward with the divorce. I was hoping, I really was, but he still doesnt even understand the full mess that he is in.

He called me Thursday night from the emergency room. He'd be picked up where he was "sleeping it off" in hais truck. I have no idea if he pulled over to drink, or if he was drinking and thought driving would be a super swell idea.

That was upsetting enough, as he had just hit a full 60 days sober, but he called again at 5am on Friday, asking for me to come and pick him up.

If I had been more awake, I probably would have told him no and had him call an AA buddy. But I didn't.

Instead, I put our eight year old in the car and drove 40 minutes to go pick up his still drunk daddy from the hospital.

When I picked him up, the nurse said his BAC was currently .16. When the ambulance had brought him in, his BAC was .435.

Just to clarify, legal blood alcohol content level is .08. At .36, you have the same level as sedation for surgery. At .4, you're at high risk of death.

I can't live like this. I can't be dreading every phone call.

So, divorce it is. I've already spoken to a lawyer and I can do a little of the paperwork myself. However, because it does involve me wanting the courts to monitor B's visits with the Dark Lordling, as well as insist on breathalyzers before seeing him, a lawyer is necessary to make sure I don't screw something up horribly.

And the lawyer needs a $5000 retainer.

5 Responses to “Paying for Divorce”

  1. CB in the City Says:

    I wish you strength and peace as you go through this process. You are right; you cannot continue a marriage like this. He is married to the bottle, and it is his problem, not yours and your son's. ((Hugs))

  2. creditcardfree Says:

    That is a tough road to be on. I'm sure it is the right thing to do. Amazing he made it 60 days and then feel so hard! Do you have the $5K for the retainer? If not, what will you do to get it?

  3. snafu Says:

    If this is an uncontested divorce and the only issue revolves around alcoholic dad's visitations, can a Paralegal guide you through the process? A final consultation with a lawyer to review the already prepared paperwork might result in lower overall costs. Does your union or professional organization permit you to use their lawyers?

  4. scfr Says:

    My heart aches for you and your family just reading this. I'm so very sorry. I hope you do have the money for a very good lawyer. Snafu's suggestion of checking to see if there are any legal benefits available through your work is a very good one.

  5. Petunia 100 Says:

    I'm so sorry. Divorce is hard, but you deserve to have a peaceful life, and so does your son. Best of luck to you. {{hugs}}

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