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Holy Hannah, This Past Week

November 10th, 2012 at 03:55 pm

I'm sitting in a hotel zoning on infomercials while my husband attempts to get the kiddo to eat breakfast downstairs, and I'm still just..blitzed after this week.

Sunday, brandus told me he hadn't heard from his mom in a week. This is unusual, as they usually chat once a day. He called his uncle, her brother - uncle hadn't heard from her since Tuesday. Worried, he called the cops to go check her house, as she lives 5 hours away from us.

She isn't at the house.

I suggest calling the hospital, as her health has been poor, which is why we were moving her down to our town before Thanksgiving.

He calls the hospital, and there she is, and has been there since Thursday. She drove herself and checked herself in with an infected cat bite, but hadn't called because she "couldn't figure out how to use the phone."

Um. Then you could have used your cell?

Brandus talked to the nurse, and told her of all of our concerns about his mother's health, which included her getting out of breath easily, her inability to walk more than 6 feet without having to hold on to something, etc. We were told they weren't sure when she'd be released, so Brandus made flight arrangements to fly up Tuesday morning - leaving Monday to arrange lesson plans for the week.

We find out Monday at 4 or 5 that she was released from the hospital at 1. We hadn't heard from her. We called several times, called and checked the kennel where she had not picked up the dog.

We waited until 7 or 8 before calling the cops again.

They went past her house - the car was there. The lights were on. They could see into her bedroom and she wasn't in bed.

We authorized a "dire need" entry, and they found her on the kitchen floor. She had fallen and hit her head, and she was dead.

4 hours after she left the hospital, she was dead.

Brandus is grim faced and easily irritated - we've been up here dealing with everything since Tuesday - we managed to get his plane ticket refunded and drove up, all 3 of us. She had told us multiple times that Brandus' name had been put on accounts and on the house and that she had a will, but all of that was a lie.

Voldemort has been a rockstar - he shouldn't have to know that we have to clean up the blood where his Mimi died. He shouldn't have had to see the condition of the house - where it was so bad the first day we wouldn't let him come inside. He has been kept happy playing with my husband's original transformers and hot wheels and helping us by counting all of the change we found in the house ($36.78 at last count).

We managed to get a lot done - cremation done, animals found and relocated to a no-kill shelter, cleaner hired to help, estate salesperson shown the house - but there is so much left to do.

The issue at this point is that we can't access her accounts yet, so everything has to be paid out of pocket. The cremation was almost $2000, the cleaner was $300 (and worth every penny for me not having to deal with the toilet and the bathtub and the cat feces everywhere), the kennel for the dog was $98, the cost of staying in a hotel for 4 nights, eating out, gas, etc...The rest of the month will be very tight. We had to split up the cost of the cremation onto two different credit cards - we couldn't pay for it out of our account or else we wouldn't be able to buy groceries for the rest of the month.

We'll be back up over thanksgiving, and we hope to be given access to her accounts then - we can't afford to pull up and replace the carpet by ourselves, and the cleaner needs to come back to deal with the deep cleaning.

My head hurts. So much to do.

20 Responses to “Holy Hannah, This Past Week”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    Oh, I am so sorry for your loss. That is a lot to take in and handle. Take it slowly if you can. It doesn't have to be done all at once, even though it may seem like it.

  2. Joan.of.the.Arch Says:

    What a shock. How difficult it must be to do all the things that must be done. You all have my sympathy.

  3. Monkey Mama Says:

    I am sorry too.

    These things are always difficult, but with "no will" it just makes it more complicated (& probably much more long and drawn out).

  4. North Georgia Gal Says:

    I am so sorry for you loss and the way you found out. I know you husband must be upset. Just keep your head up.

  5. Petunia 100 Says:

    Oh, I am so sorry. Frown

  6. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    Frown I am sorry for your loss, and for how it all came about.

  7. Ima saver Says:

    I am so sorry too!

  8. PatientSaver Says:

    Wow, that's terrible. What a shock. Yet another reminder to all of how precious life is, and how quickly it can be taken away.

  9. snafu Says:

    Condolences to you and DH, sorry for your loss. These circumstances are very difficult and can only be handled one problem and on hour at a time. Hoping the banks will co operate and allow access as his mom intended but didn't carry out. Sadly, without a will there will be further complications. Hang on to any positive news and try to see small blessings.

  10. LuckyRobin Says:

    I'm so sorry for your loss and I hope it doesn't remain so overwhelming.

  11. PNW Mom Says:

    So sorry for your loss. Frown

  12. littlegopher Says:

    So sorry about your mom-in-law and what your family is going through...take care.

  13. SnoopyCool Says:

    I'm sorry for your loss. Frown

  14. baselle Says:

    I am so sorry for your loss and how it was discovered. Its hard, but as you're digging, keep looking, you never know. My sister and I handled our dad's sudden death in 2005, and snafu has it right. You have to handle it one issue at a time, and pace yourself. I didn't think my dad had a will, but we eventually found one, dated 1964. The bank was a pisser to us up to the end - bank account was locked up to us went into probate. You'll get it eventually, but it will be a wait.

  15. CB in the City Says:

    What an awful blow, I am so sorry.

  16. Looking Forward Says:

    OMGosh! That is a terrible, crazy week. Take care and good luck.

  17. My English Castle Says:

    Oh my word--wow. Sending you wishes for strength and stamina to get through all of this.

  18. Sharon Says:

    That is a very sad loss. I was reading and thought that this was one of those ordinary endings. I was also shocked to know she had died and it was 4 hours after her release. I can imagine the challenge you’re going through. Adding to the loss, you need to make a lot of preparations and arrangements. This will pass by and you will congratulate yourself for the job well done.

  19. Jerry Says:

    I'm terribly sorry. Good thoughts and strength to you...
    Jerry

  20. librarylady Says:

    I'm so sorry to hear this. What a shock! My prayers to you and your family.
    One day at a time....

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